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Life in the Sea Organization From 1985 till 2007
Ignazio Tidu

Photo of Class VII Auditor, Ignazio TiduA very personal view and experience.

Well, like any story real or imagined, mine has its beginning. How did itall start? It was July 30 1985 when I first arrived to the European Sea Org base where my experience was about to take its course. I had recently read almost every book available at the time in Italian on the subject of Dianetics and Scientology, I had tested the basic procedures, found them to be workable and practical, so being completely fascinated by the teachings of L. Ron Hubbard, decided to dedicate my life to help others by joining the Sea Organization ranks. It wasn't very difficult for the recruiter to close me; I had already made up my mind before he knew me at all.

So next day I was doing my basic educational training called Product zero. It consists of according to the teachings, of orienting a new member into the Sea Organization and increasing his abilities to confront MEST (Matter, Energy, Space, and Time) in their various aspects one runs into them in life. It included cleaning spaces, renovating etc. followed by a five hours period of study about the Sea Organization and its basic policies. My first impact was a bit shocking, when I was shown the premises of the place, and the berthing facilities. It wasn't what I had envisioned but a very poor image, but I wasn't going to give up just because of an ugly looking building and definitely not presentable berthing facilities, so I did my part and eventually completed my product zero in about four weeks.

Mind you, I had forgotten to tell you that since my reading of the book one of Dianetics, I had made a firm decision to become an auditor and a very best one of them. Having completed that introductory step I was briefly sent down to Milano to help a fellow staff member named Rico Loringett, who was down there to find customers for the services offered by the organization. In that occasion I had another unexpected surprise, when I was shown were I was supposed to sleep, at the then offices in Cormano, near Milano, there was an empty room and a mattress on the bare floor. I was again shocked, wondering to myself, what the hell is the matter here?

In 25 years of my life I had never seen such a disgrace yet that was supposed to be the elite group I had decided to join so eagerly. I tried to ignore what it could just be a mere unfortunate coincidence of an office being moved from a place to another and me being there at the wrong time.

The next day I meet this fellow staff member, he was simply contacting customers and selling church services sort of speak. After a couple of weeks of me being there, I was informed that I had been selected to go to Flag for training. Flag is the highest training Sea organization on the whole planet. I was very excited; it was like a privilege for me thinking I was soon going to become an auditor, just as I had planned. However that wasn't yet to happen, my own Organization, known as AOSH EU+AF at the time, had selected me for some other training, merely that of course supervisor, so I could train others. I was a bit disappointed, having no interest for that with the idea I wasn't good at all in training people. I knew I could learn things rapidly, but it was another thing when I tried to explain the subject to others, they simply couldn't get it, yet it seemed so simple to me.

Upon expressing my concern on the above, I was told not to worry as I wasn't going to explain anything, but would learn how to do it properly. So, I began to get ready for my first journey to Florida and find out in person what Flag was all about. It's called “The mecca of technical perfection” and I was more than just curious about it. So I got hold of a visa for entering the US and within few days I was for the very first time in America!

Despite being October 10 1985, it was very hot and humid at the Tampa Airport. I got a cab and went to Clearwater. There another surprise hit my face. The berthing facilities were horrific, even if they were rooms in the Forth Harrison, which at the time was undergoing renovations. I seemed to get too often in unpleasant room and board services of rather poor quality, yet I was part of the elite corps of the Sea Organization. It didn't quite add up, but it seemed not very important. So I began my training for which my own organization in Europe, was supposed to pay the senior organization of FSO (the Flag Service Organization).

From October 85 till March 86 I did a basic training which enabled me to become a course supervisor. I also received some processing from other students so it seemed to make me feel better and I was happy with it. Upon completion of my training line up I managed to return to my own base in Copenhagen. I was rapidly posted as the staff course supervisor and began to work at it. Another odd surprise upon returning to my berthing in Denmark was the fact that my luggage bag which I had stored in my berthing before leaving to the US, had been tampered with and someone had stolen personal belongings.

It was much unexpected as it was a church, but somebody robbed me. While getting familiar with my new post and berthing spaces, I had noticed that the food was so poor and unpleasant to eat that I had to use personal money to cope with it.

For security reasons someone had to stay on Watch duties all night long and when it came my turn I noticed that there was no logic preparation for a whole night long having to stay awake and alert. I give you an example, when I was in my military service, if I was on watch duty, I could go to sleep in between and so be properly set up for the actual time on duty. Well I'd have expected a similar thing, but it wasn't so. After having been on post all day long on Fridays, I was then supposed to stay all night long awake till next morning when the next guy will replace me. Needless to say, it was very hard to stay awake watching a monitor showing the locked up gate. Anyway, believe it or not, nothing was going to discourage me, but I had a brief moment of crisis.

It was not so easy to run a course room of staff members and particularly at the beginning when almost nobody would show up for study and the so called Executives where not an exception. According to the study Tech, as taught by LRH, they all were blown students full with misunderstood words. After a few months at it, I began to wonder if I had done the right thing, I felt as if I was wasting my time, I didn't train as an auditor and I was becoming more and more unhappy with the whole scene. So I decided I'd take a break and think it over. Unbeknownst to anybody else, I prepared my luggage and left the place to return home, in my beloved Sardinia. My fiance was rather surprised to see me, I had factually abandoned her upon my departure in July 85 with the idea that she'd eventually graduate the university and eventually join me later. That never happened of course. The next day I got a call from the so called chaplain which informed me that I was to return to the base right away or I'd get declared as a suppressive person. I had no clue of the so called severity of my action and most certainly didn't want to be declared by any means. I became more and more nervous and even my girlfriend noticed I wasn't happy at all despite being with her. That definitely proved to her she wasn’t ever going to join me in my new lifestyle.

After a week or so I returned to the base in Denmark and had to get sorted out with my status. I decided to stay, believing it was more important than anything else at the time. Shortly after, my girlfriend split up from me and told me so during a phone call. I was rather upset, but still convinced I was doing the right thing. In the following months, I began to train myself as an auditor, using my daily study time. That was what I wanted most, so regardless of anything else I focused on that point. Meanwhile, I got to know a very nice girl who came for services and in a very short time I became attracted to her. We became friends and in a couple of occasions I kissed her. I was so naive, I felt like being in love, I was so happy, I even told my sister about it over the phone. My happy moment however, wasn't going to last very long. She was not a member of the Sea Organization and we were not supposed to have any form of affection that would lead into creating a relationship. I felt I had kept my hands clean so I wasn't much worried about consequences, but our happy moments had to cease, so they did. Eventually another female staff member noticed me and having had a similar sentimental upset of her own, we began to share our feelings which resulted in her coming to a point of wanting to marry me. I wasn't in love with her even if she was a nice person, plus she already had a baby girl and the father had deserted both. I couldn't imagine me becoming a husband and a father all at once. Funny enough, I did exactly that; I married her, and adopted the child, a very beautiful one indeed.

As we went along in our relationship and so forth, we both discovered the fact of having known each other already. In other words for those who know the subject and have some personal reality on having lived before, we both recalled some common incidents and in a particular touchy moment, while having dinner at a restaurant in Copenhagen, I recalled her name from the previous life and wrote it down on her towel without saying anything. She busted into tears the moment she read that, knowing well what it meant.

Anyway, life went on with very little to no pay at all for week after week, it came to a point I had to use my savings from my account in Italy. I recall feeling ashamed, I was still fascinated by the technology, but I was very unhappy with the living conditions, but managed to keep it quiet and never mentioned to outsiders as it'd be bad promotion for my team and the Sea Organization. Additionally a new issue came out which denied the possibility of having children in the Sea organization, in other words, if a new baby was conceived after that point, either one had to abort the child or leave the Sea organization. I’ve, never believed that to be based on any LRH policy and I still am convinced that to be the case, but protesting such things is not viewed too well within the organization. I was upset about it, as I wanted at least a son of mine in addition to the one I had adopted with the marriage. At one point, the local schedule, which was already very demanding, was deprived of what used to be called “Parents time” as it was about 1 hour a day, to be dedicated to the kids, for whoever was a parent. It was very unpopular as it meant, no kid could see their parents except very early in the morning as by the time we'd return home, never before 22.30, they were all in bed asleep. No further comment is necessary for any reader who happens to be a parent too.

However my desire to become a very skilled auditor was enough to make all the rest seem unimportant. With that urge, I rapidly trained myself as class IV auditor and much more while still posted as supervisor. Based on service delivery needs from the Organization, I held different course Supervisor posts regardless of my original dislike for it. The time was going by, yet my own Organization executive body wouldn't pay very much attention to my request of wanting to be an auditor. One evening at a weekly staff meeting I expressed my disappointment for it to the rest of the crew. Nothing changed despite the above and I was getting more and more stuck in a post which wasn't what I really came for. Sometime later, I became so upset that I decided to route out, pay for my own training and eventually return if anybody was interested in having an auditor on staff. I went to see the chaplain about it all, without mentioning it to anybody else, according to internal policy. He managed to convince me to stay with the idea that he'd get my request listened to. After some time a new technical evolution came about, which in turn, got me again stuck in another course supervisor duty. It seemed like an unreachable goal, but nevertheless still desirable enough to nullify all the counter-intentions.

So I did the New Pro TRs evolution, for those not familiar, it's a course which teaches the handling of communication in all its facets and for a professional use as an auditor. That was in 1989 I recall, I became famous with my students getting through the processing step done at the clay table. Some still remember me after 20 years with praise. Finally, a new person joined staff and there was a possibility that I could turn over my post to him. That happened eventually, after he got trained for the job, however, because of a silly mistake he made, which resulted in the course room being set on fire by accident, he was rapidly removed. Anyway my persistence came to fruition and having trained as much as the other posted auditors, I finally earned my new post, I was an HGC auditor. That was the year 1991. I was happy and began to practice with excitement and in a relatively short time I could produce as much as the top colleagues. The time went by and I was definitely getting many persons through the required steps of the route outlined by LRH, towards higher conditions of spiritual awareness.

My clients were happy and satisfied of their personal experience in the sessions I had given them. I started to consider that perhaps it was also my time to move through the Bridge steps and find out what the OT levels were all about. I was sure I had deserved that privilege. So, I arranged for a co-audit with a fellow auditor and it was a relatively smooth ride up to the point of earning my invitation to OT I.

I enjoyed my personal experience and became adept at auditing myself on whatever processes is part of that level and I completed it. Then I went to the next level OT II. For these who have done it, I mention a sort of peculiar experience, following a goof made by the in charge of the Solo section. He gave me the subject to be addressed in session, before I was actually in the auditing room and It activated the process instantly to a point that when I was holding the electrodes to start the session, it was almost impossible to keep the needle from reacting. I followed the instructions and in due time I completed also that very peculiar level. Finally it came the time for the most mysterious level known as OT III or The Wall of Fire. I learned my materials and began my practical application and it seemed very interesting indeed.

By then I was getting better and better at my post, then a new surprise arose. It was about June 1994 and each organization had to send someone to Flag for the training on the revised version of the CCRD materials (A specific rundown designed to establish whether or not one had validly achieved the state of Clear).

I had the pleasure to know a very pleasant person who was in charge of the evolution, Mr. Dan Koon. He's well known for having been with LRH and particularly for being the model of the Technical training film known as TR4 the Pro Trs film. How did that relate to me? I'll tell you just in a moment. For the above project, the org had to send a Class IX auditor and a course Supervisor. The class IX got named, but it seemed a bit difficult to name a course Supervisor for the job, and guess who got named? I couldn't believe it myself when I was told, they wanted me to go!

I was already an experienced Professional course supervisor and regardless of now being on post as an HGC auditor, somebody got the bright idea to send me! I didn't want to go, it meant I had to be away from my family for God knows how long and didn't like the idea at all, besides the fact that I didn't want to go back and be again a course supervisor. Needless to say, I ended up doing it, merely for duty reasons rather than pleasure. So I embarked on my next trip to Flag with a colleague of mine. I did what I was supposed to do, and thank God I was in the middle of my OT III auditing, so I had a very good excuse not to be held at FSO for years to train there on a new line up being piloted. After one month I was back home, meaning to my own organization and I supervised the delivery of the new course as mentioned above. It wasn't a long evolution, so I was happy to resume my official post of HGC auditor. The excitement didn't last very long.



 

Comments   

 
+1 # DJ 2009-12-05 16:23
Madonna che brutta storia. Anch'io ero in SO per un po' di tempo e me ne sono andato per le stesse ragioni. Mi dispiace per te Ignazio. Spero che la tua vita sita andando meglio adesso.
 
 
-1 # Ignazio 2009-12-06 02:12
Thanks, life couldn't get any worse and being out of the sea org is a release in itself.
 
 
# Kirsi Ojamo 2009-12-06 03:45
Ignazio, unbelievable. The courage with which you lived through it all is beyond words I can put together. I remember you well and am proud to be able say that. Professional is the first idea coming to mind when I think of you. Thank you for sharing your story.
 
 
+1 # Thoughtful 2009-12-06 09:12
Courage and professionalism... I can't think of two better words to describe Ignazio!
 
 
+4 # Salvatore Angius 2009-12-06 04:19
Vorrei mettermi in contatto con Ignazio, anche io sono uscito dalla Chiesa 4 anni fa, comunque sto continuando e dopo aver finito OTVII, L11, L12, L10 sto attualmente facendo OTVIII senza di loro e con grande soddisfazione.
 
 
# Ignazio 2009-12-06 10:28
Ciao Salvatore, mi ricordo di te. Contattami al a presto. Ignazio
 
 
# RJ 2009-12-06 16:06
Wow, Ignazio that is an incredible story.
 
 
# Ignazio 2009-12-07 01:20
Yes I know it sounds incredible, but it's still true as the sun that rises and sets. ML Ignazio.
 
 
# Dagny 2009-12-06 16:53
Ignazio,

Thank you for sharing your story.

I will admit that I was hoping that this was not also happening on the ship (naive I know) and that Sharon and Mike would not stand for it. A very sad disappointment.

My heart aches for those I dearly love who are ship staff and have to fight against this inhumane treatment - even if only the potential of such treatment.
 
 
# Ignazio 2009-12-07 01:18
Thanks Dagny,you are right, the ship is not always that theta place as it gets promoted and neither Sharon nor Mike are an exception. They are pawns in the game and can get pretty psychotic too. ML Ignazio.
 
 
+1 # Anonymous Reader 2009-12-07 05:57
Thank you for your years of devotion and for all the people whose lives you have touched and changed as an auditor. You have my deepest respect and admiration.
 
 
# Ignazio 2009-12-07 14:58
Thank you very much.
 
 
+1 # Paolo 2009-12-07 16:23
Ignazio thank you for sharing your story.

I can attest you were a good and caring auditor. You audited me at the FSO and it went very well.

It's funny that while I was on my way out of the church you did gave me a C/S 53 by indication in Milan (arc x session) and you indicated something that was actually happening to me: "Feel attacked". At the time I was under attack by the C. of S... Shortly thereafter I got declared...

I wish you well my friend and good luck on reuniting your family.

Best Paolo
 
 
# Ignazio 2009-12-07 21:21
Dear Paolo, thanks for your kind remark, it brings joy to my heart. Feel free to contact me at my personal mail
 
 
+1 # Boyd Hutchins 2009-12-07 17:45
So nice to hear that someone else had a similar experience to mine in a sec check. I thought I was sort of crazy for a while. I thought my sec check I got at Flag was taking up nothings. I ended up lying to see what the meter would do after several hours of being completely lost and blank. Never experienced something like that on the cans, really bizarre. I was spinning afterwards and it was ended off, don't know how I F/Nd or if I did.

I ended up saying things which I didn't even believe because I'd be asked what I'm thinking and I'd say whatever I imagined after the question. I wasn't thinking anything besides how messed up this is. The Sec checker had something in his ear and he'd not want to take a "read" up, but this guy in the other room would talk to him in his ear and he'd take it up with me.
There's got to be some out tech if the sec check leaves you spinned in.
04' at Flag.
 
 
# Ignazio 2009-12-07 21:21
No kidding! Your auditor wasn't running the session for you, but for somebody else. Totally squirrel!!
 
 
+1 # Caspar de Rijk 2009-12-11 10:53
Ciao Ignazio,

sono Caspar appena letto la tua storia incredible, but on the other hand I have indeed read similar stories and my own has some similarity as well.

I would like to talk to you in person some time or other. I intend to take some action in the socalled Freezone to clean up the squirreling that is going on and possible unite the field.

There is another person whom I would like you to meet as well.

Let me know if you are interested and otherwise I wish you well.

m. love,
Caspar
 
 
# Ignazio 2009-12-12 01:29
Hi Caspar, nice to hear from you.Get in touch with me on my mail or better with msn messenger so we can also talk live. Of course I heard how bad you went, but it was the same church speaking who also tells the same of me, so no wonder we are both off. My mail is bye for now. Ml Ignazio.
 
 
+1 # Theo Sismanides 2009-12-13 09:43
Hi Ignazio, I have already written up and sent you an e-mail. What is amazing is not the wrong making you got as an auditor, (we all out here know now that DM is a bully and a dictator trying to... I don't know, give a very bad show of Scientology to the world outside and inside) what is amazing is your persistence to audit people and help LRH no matter what.

Remember one thing, you are now free to AUDIT, big time, man!!! Ha ha!

Welcome Back, mate!!!
ML, Theo Sismanides
 
 
# Ignazio 2009-12-14 06:00
Dear Theo, thanks a lot.
 
 
+1 # LO 2009-12-15 08:40
Ignazio,

On your long journey as auditor, did you ever learn to audit in German ?

Hey Caspar,
any chances to deliver SHSBC and class VIII ?
just wondering.

Arc
 
 
# Ignazio 2009-12-16 00:57
Dear LO, sorry to disappoint you, My german is not sufficient to audit anybody.
 
 
# Caspar 2009-12-18 01:02
Hi Lo,

anything the church delivers can be delivered in the Freezone except the blows :-)

Caspar
 
 
+1 # michela 2009-12-15 08:41
There is an Italian translation?
 
 
+1 # Aurelio 2009-12-15 08:41
Ignazio,

Thanks for your story, which is a great read.

I have recently read several long articles and full-length books about life in the Sea Org by former scientologists, including descriptions of life at Hemet, Clearwater, Saint Hill, and the Los Angeles Complex. Your account of life on the Freewinds is a valuable contribution to the picture puzzle of Scientology that is now emerging in all its nefarious glory. The more people know about all facets of this organization, the better. Your account of your experience is a real public service. Thanks.
 
 
+1 # Ignazio 2009-12-16 00:59
Ciao Aurelio and thanks. You're right, the freewinds is no exception to the human abuses taking place within the current church.
 
 
+1 # cliff 2009-12-28 06:27
Hi, Thank you for your story. It informed me of the current state of C.o Scient. I left around 1980 so was lucky to escape extreme outpoints. I still get audited successfully with icause and Tommy who I regard highly. You are such a valuable being and I commend you for all the help you have given to others. I recently read" journey of souls" by Micheal Newton, Ph.D and it was a revelation. Check it out. I just returned from Israel and Jerusalem where exciting things were happening a couple of thousand years ago. Hope you have a great future with the independents as they who value a being of your ability. Be nice to meet you someday, regards, Cliff Taylor, UK
 
 
+1 # Ignazio 2009-12-29 01:47
Dear Cliff, thanks! If we'll ever meet someday, it'll certainly be a pleasure. ML Ignazio.
 
 
+1 # Alice 2010-02-27 10:51
Dear Ignazio,
thank you for sharing your story.
When I read it yesterday I forgot all my life around me and could see those things happen before my eyes.
Though not having been myself in the Sea Org, in the '70s and '80s I have been in the SO-quarters in the Nordland-Hotel in Copenhagen, as well as those in St. Hill in the UK and I have supervised a short time in the Flag Crew Course room in Clearwater.
Each of these experiences was a shock. But after I was through that initial shock I felt complete admiration for these staffmembers who had so much Affinity that such circumstances could not stop them to help their fellow beings.
Afterwards I was in awe, when I saw them acting on their posts. I have no other words for that.
Thank you for what you have done - while being on staff and after. And thanks again for sharing your adventures. It has raised my confront.

Love
Alice
 
 
+1 # maria spencer 2010-04-22 07:12
Brave man I have to say , well done your out and hoefully what your doing is working to wards the quality of life for you and your surroundings take care
 
 
+2 # Songbird 2010-04-24 18:57
Hello Ignazio,

I read every word of your detailed write up. I do not doubt one word. Your tenacity in applying standard tech, even when half starved and sleep deprived is more than admirable, it's miraculous...

Now you need to continue to apply your skills as a Cl XII auditor to clean up the C of S's overt products. Good luck, my friend. I will be coming out soon...

ML,
Songbird
 
 
+1 # Ignazio 2010-04-26 23:52
Thanks a lot my friend, whoever you are, you show understanding on your message. Yes, now I'm taking care of the mess created by the current regime and preventing new ones from occurring.
 
 
+1 # Rob 2010-07-05 15:39
Hi Ignazio,

Yours is a cruel yet familiar story. How ironic that the Organization established for "removing the ills of man" harbors a management whose highest leaders are committing those very ills--- and in numbers.
I admire both your courage and tenacity in your experience and subsequent release.

I experienced similar suppressive treatment while an SO crew at ASHO-D back in the earlier days. I routed out after months of jumping through the off-policy flaming hoops and other suppressive obstacles. They play a very low toned game and really didn't care about keeping me around as I challenged their phony authority with gusto. I would have pulled them upscale and they weren't having any of that.

What a shame that they pervert the way out for so many? We'll all make it, I know that. But what a colossal cost in needlessly suffering individuals.

Imagine for a moment a Religion created to save mankind and offer sanity.

But who will save us from the highjacking of this Religion? Anyone interested? I am.


Rob
 
 
# Ignazio 2010-07-06 13:32
Thanks Rob.
 
 
+1 # Watchful Navigator 2011-11-02 12:23
Thank you so much for sharing your story, Ignazio. Your persistence in life and love for the tech is inspiring.
 
 
# Anita Warren 2012-07-01 11:32
Thank you for telling your powerful story. It needed to be told, as do many others. I would like to ask you something. Would you email me privately? Thank you.
Highest affinity, Anita Warren
 

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An answer to the corrupt monopoly of Scientology

This website is a simple answer to those who tried to monopolize and corporatize spiritual freedom: An open gateway dedicated to helping people move up to higher levels of awareness and ability under their own steam.

Click to visit iScientology.org

31 Factors for Scientologists to Consider

The Pertinent Manifesto"Scientology has been taken over by a self-appointed dictator, David Miscavige, who has turned the Creed of the Church of Scientology, the Code of a Scientologist, and the Credo of a True Group Member on their heads and instituted the virtual practice of Reverse (Black) Dianetics..."  Learn More...

Opinion poll

Is David Miscavige a crook?
 
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