The Church of Scientology is not dead; it's Type III. This story proves it. - Thoughtful
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| Mike Roiger, while on training at AOSH UK, in late 2004 |
My name is Mike Roiger and I am formally disconnecting from the Church of Scientology after 18 years, 14 or which were on Staff, and 12 of those posted as the Senior Case Supervisor at the Cincinnati Class V Organization. I am a Grad VA C/S (XDN Specialist), CCRD C/S (2006), FPRD C/S, Purif C/S, KTL/LOC C/S, etc (all GAT). I’ve done over 50 courses in various academies from Atlanta to Cincinnati to AOSH UK to Flag.
In the Fall of 2009, I was ordered to Flag, along with all of the other SNR C/S’s in the world, to do some new Apprenticeship dealing with the Grades. Flag had been running a new Grades Pilot. It was supposed to be so secretive, but all you had to do was read Source magazine to get most of the data. Oddly, I was ordered to Flag in 2008 for something dealing with the Grades. At that time, I thought we were going to get data on the “new” Grades that had been secretly piloted. I remembered a video of DM speaking to the OT Ambassadors in 2001 or 2002 where he said that there were new Grades coming out that would allow the common man, as opposed to well-to-do chiropractors and dentists, to afford the Bridge. So, I thought, “hey, we’re going to get the ‘new’ Grades checklists.” Oh, was I wrong! We first had to Method 9 Word Clear the whole of the KSW Series in chronological order, then we were to “cognite” that all of the Grades that we had been delivering were quickied. I went through it, but really did not abide to these “new” rules of having to audit every single process of every single Grade, and do them over if the pc did not spit out the magical words of the Flows EP’s - exactly.
With that memory fresh in mind, I blew Flag off as long as I could and finally arrived in March 2010. Of course, upon arriving there was the obligatory Ethics cycle of all of the “out-Tech” I had been committing since 2008, replete with more Lower Conditions. As part of the Liability formula, I had the arbitrary order to get a set of Advanced Clinical Course Lectures donated to Cincinnati Qual. That’s $5,000. I don’t Reg - never have and never will. I’m a Red-on-white guy and “stupidly” take “no” for an answer. After 3 weeks of daily begging virtually every Scientologist I have ever known in 18 years, I finally got that last $50 donation. 26 different people donated to this cycle. It was one of the worst 3-week stretches of my life. It seemed everyone was maxed out due to Idle org and IAS donations. I swear, if I was making more than $150 per week, I would have paid for it myself!
In the middle of this 3-week hell, my cad’s cancer took a turn for the worse, and I had to fly home to Dallas, after getting an “emergency” CSW approved through some terminals. I have to say that everyone was very understanding and gave me immediate approval.
After spending a couple of weeks in Dallas, I decided that I could not stand being cooped up in the Student Motels, which is where the Outer Org Trainees stay - 8-10 grown men per dive motel room. I flew back to Cincinnati for a day and picked my car and drove to Florida.
I should mention, that a major part of the Ethics cycle was that I was being forced to program extraneous things on people’s Bridges, such as FPRD on all Grade IV completions and XDN on most NED Case Completions. Every time that I would come back from training at Flag I would attempt to put people up the Bridge only to be creamed by our Chief Reg and CO (married to each other and SO). I would literally receive Cramming Orders and Ethics Chits up to RTC. I was the SNR C/S, yet was continuously told how out-Tech it was not program for FPRD after Exp Grade IV, all based on one sentence from C/S Series 112RA which did not say “must,” but said “can and should.” I did KTL and I know the difference. Suffice it to say I caved in to the Gross Income demands every time, thus, my continual Ethics problem at Flag. It seems I did not have the balls to stand up to them - one was a 39-yr Class VIII SO veteran…and the one who signed my paychecks. So, now I am out-KSW for both programming FPRD and for not programming FPRD - stuck in the middle. I don’t do well in the middle.
I came back to Flag and lived off-base at a friend’s apartment. I got through the ethics and the cramming having the same “cognitions” that I always had about not applying KSW blah, blah, blah. So, I started to audit on the “new” Grades. My first pc was someone who had not had auditing since the early 1980’s, and who had just bought all three L Rundowns. My mission was to get her through all of the Grades rapidly (75 hours) and then onto L 11. By the way, she was “Clear,“ so we had to give her the Not Clear R-Factor. One big problem: her needle was unresponsive and did not match her indicators at all. I Red-Tagged her 4 times the first week, then 4 times the next week and got kicked off the case after a double Red Tag. During this time I did not have “Cramming OK” because I had not gotten an L1C after getting back to Flag. Being Clear whittles your chances down for a session quite a lot - I can’t imagine what an OT on training lines goes through! I had many undone crams with several mis-called F/Ns. Calling F/Ns is not as black and white as is implied! Oftentimes the Cram Off and the C/S differ in what is an F/N.
So, now I am back in Ethics for mis-called F/Ns (Doubt). At least I didn’t have the RTFN pressure (Right the F--k Now, a favorite saying by those running the Flag HGCs). I limped through the Ethics, then Cramming and I was ready to take on another pc. I gave one of the best sessions I’ve ever given at Flag and went to lunch. Unfortunately, during lunch, I found out that my Dad died that morning, so I had to get another “emergency” CSW approved and I was out the door. I was supposed to directly return to Flag following the funeral. Obviously, when a parent dies, you can’t just fly off to Flag after the funeral, and I was home for about 3 weeks. What really pissed me off though, was that the Board I/C texted me on the day of Dad’s funeral wanting me to audit somebody. Not good. I cut all communication off.
In the meantime, I had been in communication with my CO back in Cincinnati. There were some problems back there and she wanted me to go there for a couple of weeks before returning to Flag. Since I was pissed off at Flag, it was quite an easy choice.
At this time, I still had undone C/S crams at Flag, which did not even enter my mind. I went back to Cincinnati, and, of course, I C/Sed folders for them. Not many, because I was needed on a “special project” to “handle” 3 or 4 Tech Staff who were on Leaving Staff Routing Forms. Usually a pretty easy project, only, the I/C was the Chief Reg who is about half nuts and thinks he’s the second coming of LRH. His method of handling is to inflict as much mental pain as possible with threats, invalidation and evaluation. For some odd reason, I thought we could work together, even though I’ve never been able to work with him. His orders range from arbitrary to insane. Anyway, the current order was for me to make them guilty and “rub their noses in it” via metered Ethics Interviews with the assumption they were all SPs, then work them all through lower conditions. I was to stay in constant telephone communication with him as he was not in the org and on some medical LOA that had nothing with doctors or medicine. Apparently, I did not respond to a question right or said or implied something wrong or had a comm lag (I don’t know), but the tables got turned on me and suddenly I was the Who behind virtually every bad statistic in the org. Now I’m being invalidated and evaluated for and being giving wrong indications galore! Enough of that, I refused to take his calls. I didn’t have to hide much because he was never in the org. At this point, I was thinking, “what do I need this shit for?”
I don’t know when it was that I first made the decision to break away from the insane asylum. I’ve had fleeting thoughts for quite some time. But, after this latest BS, I knew I was a short-timer.
By now, it is probably August and Flag finally put enough pressure on the line to get me back there. It was determined by going directly to the D/Capt for Training by my CO, that I was to go down there and get through my C/S Crams and the CCRD Crams with our CCRD Auditor. It was unfortunate that this data never made it from Div 7 Flag to Div 5 Flag. When I arrived, I was sent directly to the MAA who was really beside herself that I went to Cincinnati and C/Sed folders instead of returning directly to Flag. Added to that was another dog-cussing that I don’t have the gonads to keep Scientology working and how much of a disappointment I was as a Senior C/S. At this point I quit giving a shit.
Somehow, the CCRD Auditor and I made it through Ethics having the same “cognitions” as usual and we were given retreads on the CCRD course. We completed that in a few days, then it was time for C/S Cramming. As I wanted to hurry this along, I mistakenly went the SHSBC course room to have a student fly my Ruds. THIS WAS THE ABSOLUTE WORST SESSION OF MY LIFE! 5-½ hours on one reading MWH question. I have to say that the Clearwater weather and my Scandinavian body don’t mix - I’m sure my needle was crap, but it wasn’t from me withholding things! I had ONE F/N in that overlong session and F/Ned right away at Exams - a “relief F/N“ at best. Obviously, F/Ns were missed. I vowed to myself then that if I get out of Flag, I ain’t comin’ back.
The C/S Crams went fine, then it was time to leave. Oops, nobody told the Qual terminals that I was only there for Cramming and they were attempting to make me stay for the rest of the Grades Apprenticeship (4-6 more weeks).
So, I got on the phone to my CO, who called the D/Capt who “OKed” me to leave. I my way out the door, I was to take some folders by hook or by crook. So, I marched around the HGCs and found two of them and packed them in an empty e-meter case and put them in my trunk, effectively stealing folders under orders of my CO. At this point, I just wanted to leave, I didn’t care.
A few hours later, I still had not been OK’ed to leave from Qual/HCO and my CO ordered me to walk out the door (blow) because we had 3 CCRDs scheduled that weekend. So I did. A couple of days later I received this blazing message from the MAA calling me suppressive and cussing up a storm. Again, I was stuck in the middle. I blew it off.
Come to find out, there were no CCRDs scheduled. I was lied to again for what could only be PR reasons to schedule people. All I’m thinking at that point is “Oh what tangled webs we weave when we practice to deceive.” Now I’m in serious trouble with Flag for leaving under false pretenses. What a mess. So I block it out of my mind and start to work.
Within a few days, I am ordered out to North Ohio on a reg cycle. The plan was for me to audit a pc, whose folder was supposed to be at Flag under OSA review, then reg her for several thousand. We had a good session, then the Reg shows up at 10:00 PM. The cycle is unsuccessful, but we are under orders that we cannot leave until we get the money. We are stuck in northern Ohio for the whole next day until she finishes her patients (7:30 PM). What in the hell is the Senior C/S doing this for? We are eventually successful and leave for Cincinnati at about midnight and drive all the way home arriving at about 4:30 AM. Crazy.
Then the following week, Wednesday again, I am ordered at 10:00 PM to drive to Louisville, KY on another Reg cycle. It turns out that the staff member who is being regged, has been regged by the Idle Org people for 3 days straight and they got $50K out of him. The CO orders us to get another $20K for auditing -- this is a staff auditor for Christ sakes! We get there about midnight and he is not real happy to see us, but he is a good guy and puts a pot of coffee on. We are not there very long before he realizes that it is a Reg cycle. We are there under orders of not leaving until the money is gotten. At about 2:30 AM he gets pissed and drives off leaving us holding our you-know-whats. Only after this happens, are we “allowed” to go home. By this time it is definite that I am not going to be part of this organization in the future. Disgusting.
A few days later, the shit has really hit the fan on my having “blown Flag.” It’s shot all through CLO EUS and up into Int land. I was in my office with the LC, the HAS and the HES on the speaker phone talking to the CO who was in California for something or other and we started talking about when I would head back to Flag. Suddenly, the LC jumped up and threw me out of my own office for about 20 minutes while she had a “private” conversation with the CO. I was finally allowed back into my office, and the CO ordered me to fly to Flag on the next flight out. I was in shock. Everybody said OK. I had no plans to follow through with the order.
Luckily, I was smart enough to tell the HES that I would drive down and not to get me an airplane ticket. I went home, packed my things, winterized my motorcycle and drove West, not South. The farther away I got, the happier I was. I drove all the way to Illinois, then called Mom. She was completely relieved that I was leaving the cult (I didn’t know she thought it was a cult!). I knew she was in Minnesota visiting relatives and she invited me up there, so I drove North.
I arrived at my Aunt’s Lakehouse near Bemidji. MN and rested for several days.
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| Decompressing in the corn fields of Minnesota. |
Alright, I am at the Lake in Minnesota. It’s a beautiful area. Just chillin’ out. My Aunt and Mom are really pissed at what has been “done” to me. I’m still in the mode that I did it all to myself. They are VERY happy that I broke away from the cult of Scientology. I had to tell them the truth as I had intentionally left the truth out for so many years, such as working 7 days a week for sometimes up to 102 hours in a week, the fact that I blew through my entire Employee Savings Investment Program (401K) in a year, that I filed for Bankruptcy, that I had been living without Health Insurance or any benefits, etc. Of course, this “new” truth enraged them. That didn’t last long as we were in a log cabin with a nice fire going. Very rustic. Few amenities. Just perfect!
The next day we went to Itasca State Park, which is the source of the Mississippi, to look at the Fall colors with the leaves changing. A nice cool, clear day. We stopped and ate best cheeseburger I’ve ever had at a local bar and grill. I was beginning to really like my new life.
Alas, the weekend was coming to a close and it was time to leave until the next weekend. So, it was time to go to the farm. Nothing quite like a huge expanse of flatland off of a gravel road in Northern Minnesota with the blackest dirt anywhere. By this time, my cell phone was maxed out on voicemails and texts. I guess, 4 or 5 days after I left, they finally figured out that I was not at Flag. The first thing I did was send out a couple of e-mails so they knew I was not laying dead in a ditch somewhere off I-75. Then, I composed a succinct resignation letter and mailed it in along with my keys.
This is when the e-mails got really wild. I will include a couple since I’m sure this posting is being used against me. This first one is from the ED/CO indicating they thought they had a chance at “recovering” me:
“Mike,
This is Jeremy and Jeanie is right now dictating this to me.
Mike, I received your letter of resignation today.
I have disapproved it and you will not be resigning from the Church.
I can't resign, and so you can't resign.
Hey, to divert, Michael Vick has the starting job now. He's an artist. Most graceful player out there. Frankly. The Bengals and Eagles have as good a shot as anybody.
Now buddy, the 2 states you've been hanging out in have teams that are 0-2. So time to come back east.
I can't get the C/S'ing done so where the hell are you?
I'm counting all the people you've responded to, how come you won't talk to me? You talk to _____, the A/Tech Aide, you talk to _____, etc. From my end, I consider we've been really great friends for years. What is the problem? I will do anything on god's green earth to help you.
I don't understand something from your resignation letter and want to get the data from your heart. Am I your designated bad guy? If so, what have I done that is upsetting you?
Please tell me, what the heck happened at Flag? What in the world is going on? How can I help?
Again, I've not accept your resignation and sent the keys back to you. So there mother fucker. Your whole track buddy, aka Jeanie.”
“Mother fucker,” you’re calling me a mother fucker? That did not sit well with me and pushed me farther away. Obviously, I ignored this e-mail and refused to respond.
Then there’s this choice one from the OES, though I’m sure that it was dictated by a certain person who wanted my Ninja motorcycle, telling me that his Mom, whose house had a room that I was renting, was going to change all of the locks in the house and “sell the MEST” that I had. Obviously, you can’t pack too much in a Mitsubishi Ralliart(!) so I took mostly clothes. Luckily I took my pistol and box of 40 cal ammo. I was not smart enough to take the shotgun and 22 semi-auto. Oh well, there goes a good 40 year old Remington 870. I also left my Tag Heuer and Invicta watches… I wonder why they did not end up with the movers 6 weeks later, hmmm.
They actually told me that I had not paid rent and that I owed quite a large sum of money. We settled for $500. Do you know how much it would cost to change all of those locks and deadbolts? I saw it for the bullshit that it was.
At the same time I had the A/Tech Aide CLO EUS on the e-mail telling me I needed to go to Flag directly and blow off the Org, that he needed me to write up everything that I had a gone through. It seems he had a hard on for taking the ED/CO down for the out-Tech forced on me, or that’s what was implied. I absolutely did not want to be in the middle of that fight. There was little proof as I was the one who signed every auditing program. Plus, I was so pissed off at these nuisance KR’s and Crams that I shredded all of them. Did you know that if someone writes a Knowledge Report on you as a staff member that you are guilty until you prove yourself innocent? Kinda backwards, I’d say. There doesn’t need to be any proof of your wrongdoing, just what someone “thinks” or heard. It’s a crappy way to misuse justice.
Wow, I’ve gotten off the line a bit. OK, it’s September and harvest season. My cousin just got his hand cut up in a wood splitter and he’s a sugar beet and soybean farmer and it’s harvest time! I’ve never seen such an outpouring of support before. There is a very small window of time to harvest and it has everything to do with the weather -- temperature and rain. All of the farmers in the region brought their harvesters and trucks in to help. It was an amazing show of logistics. It usually takes 2-3 weeks for each farmer to harvest their sugar beets with a harvester and 4 trucks. These farmers got together and brought 70 trucks and a dozen harvesters from all over Minnesota and North Dakota and completed the whole harvest in one day! It was just amazing to take part in this. I had been so heavily indoctrinated in SCN that how could “wogs” do something so terrific and efficiently without heavy reg cycles. There was no call-in, no regging, just the fact that one of their own needed help, and it was done. No favors. To a man, each was doing it because they knew if something happened to them it would be handled. All had each other’s back. What a 3rd dynamic I witnessed. Hell, even the bank served free hamburgers. There was no “exchange” asked for or implied. What a bunch of happy people and not a one was Clear or OT.
It was during this time that I received an e-mail or text that the HAS and Qual Sec were ordered to fly to Texas to find me. I got reports that they had been by Mom’s house in Dallas. The next day, they went and found my sister’s house out in the country in East Texas. She was pissed and made them leave. Then Mom gets a call from a neighbor at the lake house an hour away from Dallas. They’ve been there knocking on doors asking “Have you seen Mike Roiger, he’s our friend and we want to talk to him,” blah, blah, blah.
After several days, they finally believed my e-mails saying that I’m not in Texas and please leave me alone. They persist under orders.
By this time, it’s time to go back to my aunt’s cabin to winterize it -- pull in the dock, clear the pipes, batten down the hatches as it were. It’s Sunday. Mom and my aunt drive back to the farm and me and my uncle wrap up the cabin and leave 2 hours later. As we arrive, my aunt is fit to be tied -- it seems the HAS and Qual Sec were just there. She’s pissed and chased them off the farm. A half-hour later, they went to my uncle’s sister’s house. This is a small town and news travels fast. Now all of my relatives are getting upset. I heard one of them say they could take care of them since he could have his gun in his hands in 10 sec from anywhere in the farmhouse. This is now getting ridiculous.
So I sent an e-mail to the HES telling him to call off the dogs and had to tell him that all of the farmers around here had loaded guns at the ready, plus we have relatives who are Deputy Sheriffs. That finally did it, I “threatened” violence and, worse, I threatened to call the police. Therefore I am Type C PTS. Oh, they just wanted to see their friend, blah, blah, blah. At any rate, they left town, not to be heard from again. There was quite a release of tension in the farmhouse.
So, I spent a good bit of time on blogs and this forum reading everything I could for the next few days. I was bolstered by the fact that so many Int Execs with names that I had known through years had gotten out. I made the right decision!
My time in Minnesota came to an end. I drove home to Texas, but first stopped by Minneapolis to see my cousin and we went to a Twins game. Nice ball park!!
I’m now putting my life back together again sending out resumes and doing my best at explaining away the last 11 years of my life to corporate recruiters as it has nothing to do with real world, much less the career that I dumped to be a “good staff member“.
Best of all, I’m enjoying life and riding the wheels off the Ninja motorcycle.
I have since received an SP declare… I am told. The org won’t send me a copy as it is locked up in HCO under an EYES ONLY order. I would like to see what kind of BS is on that document. Even as late as today the DSA is spreading falsehoods and lies about me to the public saying that I took potshots at staff with my shotgun on my land in Texas. The legend continues to grow…
Signed,
The Legend that is… Mike Roiger
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